S a y o n a r a: Life's Goodbye
by Parariillusion
Summary: Sho writes a song for love. He writes it for himself and Kei. Told from Kei’s and Sho’s perspective. A story on Sho’s recollection of the past, Kei’s seemingly endless future, and later, Hana’s view on the two mysterious people in her life.
1. Opening Song: Reminescence

AN: This is dedicated to my friend Courtney and her obsession with Gackt. The song in this story is called _Sayonara_ from the Rebirth album by Gackt. Moon Child does not belong to me. Enjoy!

Chapter 1: Endless Possibilities to the End

Sho paused for a second, searching for the right words for the melody echoing through his mind as a picture of Kei grew clearer in his mind. It was the collage of all their moments together; good and bad. It was a combination of that final night of friendship, when the two, with all of their friends had been together and the revulsion that he saw in Kei's eyes in that inhumane prison. It was the picture of the final moment of Kei's vampire's friend's last morning on the earth before he disappeared into smoke and the long endless future Kei had in front of him. Sho found himself weeping a bit, at the thought that Kei would live, forever, without him. He loved Kei more than his wife, but in a different kind of way. It was the eternal love that singers sing about, that poets wish to capture in their poems, that artists want to paint the aura of. It would live long after Sho died. His only consolation was that it would live on in the secret depths of Kei's heart.

He couldn't imagine life without Kei, yet he had not seen Kei for several years ever since he had visited him in the prison.

_Sayonara...aishita taisetsu na hito_

_Koboreta namida ga yuki ni kawaru_

Sho smiled at the sadness of the song that was beginning to form. He wanted to share it with the world, so that the world would cry with him.

"Boss," a gruff voice knocked at the door. "Someone here to see you."

He sighed, hastily stuffing the loose sheet of papers into a hidden drawer where he kept all the things that represented all that was intimate to him: that certain picture, a lock of Hana's hair from her first haircut, a wedding ring, and some bits and pieces that were captured moments from his hectic, dangerous life. He took a key from his pocket and locked the drawer, the click of the lock a sound of finality. His personal life hid most of the time; he couldn't have other gangs finding out his weaknesses.

"Boss," the voice called again.

Sho lifted his trenchcoat from the back of his chair and tossed it on, making sure that certain items were in there that were necessary for his protection, and checked his belt to secure his gun more tightly. He didn't want it to go off accidentally. It might kill someone. But yet again, he had to hide his uneasiness at people being killed, except that this was something he'd had to hide ever since he met Kei.

::Flashback::

"_No," the boy's mind whispered to him. "This is wrong."_

_His older companion sensed his discomfort. "Sho..."_

_"Kei! I don't want to do this! I—"Sho whispered, abruptly cut off at a signal from Kei._

_A man was rounding the corner of the building. He held a flashlight and had an assortment of weapons at his belt. He yawned, pausing in his walk to urinate on the side of the building._

_The man finished much faster than Sho thought. But by the time the watchman had reached their hiding place, Kei was already on the guy, had sliced his neck, and was now slurping the blood up. It was a sound that was grotesque and reminded Sho of why slurping soup was considered bad manners. It was reassuring, sometimes, to hear, for hearing it made Sho be able to pretend that Kei was just an animal, and was killing through his instincts. But then Kei would finish, smiling up at Sho, the blood dripping like raindrops onto the ground from his mouth...then Kei became a murderer, someone from a horror flick, but scarily human in his witty personality._

_Sho stepped back from Kei and hurled. He fell onto the ground with a thud, trying to clean himself up._

_"Sho..." Kei whispered again. "Hayaku."_

_Sho shook his head frantically, barely choking up the word. "No."_

_Kei glanced down at him, with no expression on his face, then turned to enter the building. Sho thought he heard Kei murmur, "Coward."_

_The word angered him. He felt adrenaline surge into his brain, and before he knew it, he was back on his feet, running as softly as he could after Kei._

_::Later::_

_Kei spit out blood, his hand staunching the flow at his waist as Sho looked on, horrified. _

_"Kei!" Sho cried, unable to move from shock. He had only just met the vampire a week ago, and had started to grow fond of him and see him as a mentor, and now he was losing him._

_No, Sho thought. Kei is evil, but I can't lose him. He's...this isn't right! He can't die! Sho, wake up, do something! _

_Unable to do anything else, Sho charged at the person that had shot Kei. "ARRRGH!" he screamed, as the bad man cackled evilly, holding a knife at his waist, ready to stab it into Sho's heart._

_"Sho! You airhead!" Kei said as he used his unnatural speed to reach the villain and managed to make the man drop his knife as Sho revealed his own hidden knife and stabbed the man's abdomen repeatedly._

_Die, die, die, Sho thought. Die, die, die._

_"Sho, you're going to make him lose all his blood," Kei said, pulling the knife out of Sho's grip. "Then where would I be? No blood to drink...hey, kid, I'm okay," he said, seeing Sho's iron face staring into the villain's back. "I can't die...unless...you know."_

_"...I'm not a coward," Sho muttered. "Not a coward."_

_Kei looked up suddenly from the body, examining the boy's face. After a long quiet, he burst out laughing. "And who said you were a coward?"_

_"I—"Sho said as he felt Kei's finger on his lips._

_"You were great," Kei said, ruffling his hair. "Let's go."_

_"Not a coward," Sho whispered happily to himself. _

::Present::

"Never a coward," Sho whispered, as he opened the door.

"What, sir?" the burly guard said.

"Pardon..." Sho said.

The guard rolled his eyes, then said obligingly, "Pardon, sir."

"Nothing. Who's here?"

He sighed. Sometimes the boss could be annoyingly condescending. Not that he was, the guard thought, as he felt Sho's eyes bore into his back.

"Some...blondie, sir. Says he's a friend of yours."

Sho shuddered at the prospect of Kei being there, then reminded himself that it was a lost hope.

"Sir."

"I'll see him," Sho said.

"Yes, sir."

Hayaku: Roughly translated, it means "hurry up."

AN: Like? No like? Please review!


	2. Interlude I:Inevitable Eternity of Death

AN: Thanks for the reviews! Here's the next chapter! Enjoy!

"Sir, the Boss is here."

The sunlit hair was tossed back behind his shoulders as Kei rose from the shadowed chair he was sitting in. "Sho."

"Kei...you've returned."

"Yes."

"For how long?"

"..."

Forever, Sho willed. Say the word 'forever.'

Kei stood, clothed in shadows. He had requested to wait in a room with no windows. He knew Sho wanted him to stay forever, but he was a creature of the dark, drawn from the light by a single bite of treachery. It was his destiny to move in and out of people's lives. Rather, people changed and lived and died, even his mentor. He loved Sho, but did not love him so much that he would keep him forever at his side. That is what Kei told himself, for he wanted to deny that he had any feelings for Sho. Rather, he loved Sho so much that he would not sacrifice his happiness in exchange for his own satisfaction. Even if he had satisfaction, it would be fleeting, like the sensation and taste of blood in his body. He would have to leave soon anyway, in the sense of human time, and he needed to harden his heart against parting...again.

Knowing Kei would not answer a question if he chose to, Sho asked, "Why are you here?"

Kei smiled, knowing Sho was choosing to ignore the original question. "I will be here forever."

"What?"

"But you will not. You have the short lifespan of a human, and I have an eternal life until the end of time."

"What are you saying, Kei?" Kei's words echoed menacingly off his ears. He could make no sense of them, but the melody of the words warned him.

"Good-bye, Sho," Kei whispered into Sho's ear as he ran into space and time away from Sho.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

"Ni..." Kei breathed, looking with shock at Son.

Son stared back at him, his mind responding, "He didn't fire! It was a game! He's my brother! I wouldn't have shot if I had known..." Yet he knew that it was a doomed game, just like man was cursed with an inevitable fate. Death.

"Die," Kei whispered. Die, die, die.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Sho," Kei murmured, holding his body like a delicate piece of art, created personally by fate itself.

"Kei..." Sho coughed. "You came back..."

"Stay with me, Sho," Kei whispered.

Sho shook his head, knowing what Kei was offering. He had lived his life, and now it was time to die. There was a flow of life in his body from the time he was born, and now, it was time for it to ebb for eternity.

"Sho..." Kei pleaded.

He smiled one last time, then closed his eyes, weary.

"Sho!" Kei cried, clutching his empty shell to his body, as if eternity could seep from his body to Sho's body. Hot tears dripped onto Sho's face, as if he was crying with Kei. The sun rose in the windows surrounding them, the sunlight uncovering the layers of shadow on Kei, bit by bit. But he didn't care. All he wanted was to be with Sho.

_sayonara... naiteta kinou made no boku_

_shizuka ni me o tojite_

AN: Did you like this chapter? If you didn't know, the part after the break was the part in the movie where Sho and Son were having a gunfight (the deliciousness of Wang Leehom...). I couldn't remember exactly what happened, but I remembered enough (after a while) that Sho almost died after the gunfight. Some OCC (or is it OOC)-ness, but...yeah. Hope you liked it! If you did, tell me! See you next chapter!


	3. Interlude II: Dreamhunt Through Time

Kei stood over the desk where Sho had kept all his documents. Sho had been gone for a long while, and today was the tenth anniversary of Sho's death. Kei had come here to appease his sorrow by merely touching what had belonged to Sho (it did not matter what it was, as long as it had belonged to him). Kei's hand wavered over the abandoned landscape of the desk, not knowing where to begin. He could see the faint imprints of Sho's fingers all over the desk with his uncanny ability to see details. On an impulse, he pulled a drawer open. The first thing that caught his eye was a simple piece of sheet music with a few words of writing upon it:

_ Sayonara...aishita taisetsu na hito   
Koboreta namida ga yuki ni kawaru_

Under the writing were several notes that led to a full-fledged melody. Kei smiled faintly, brushing his fingers against the paper with a shudder as he lifted it out of the dark drawer where it had been hiding from him.

As he hummed the melody slowly, then with more assurance as the flow of it overcame him, a voice grew from the darkness in the room...

_ Sayonara... naiteta kinou made no boku   
Shizuka ni me o tojite_

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Kei hummed appreciatively as he finished composing a verse. It reminded him about Sho's initial fear when he had realized that the man that he had saved was a "monster," in his brother's words. But most of all, it reminded him of that small smile that spread across his tender face as he realized that they were two parts of the same soul.

_ Sarigenaku kata o yosete   
Madobe ni motareta   
Sukoshi tereta shigusa de   
Boku wa waratteita   
Karuku hoho ni kisu o shite   
Aruiteyuku kimi o zutto miteta_

"Kei..." a voice said lovingly from behind him. "I'm back."

"Done so fast, Hana?" he asked. She had been working on a picture that was in her father and mother's memory. Actually, it was a parody based on her mother's painting that had been placed in the exact same place where her's was now being displayed. It was a symbol of hope to Kei, which had waned over the years; an angel holding her unstained arms to the world below.

"What was that tune you were humming, Kei? You've hummed it so much ever since I was little, but you never told me what it was."

"I didn't hum it to you when you were little. You never saw me when you were small," Kei said, evading the question.

"Well, someone did," Hana said. "Whatever, Kei," she shrugged, walking off to her bedroom. "I'm going to go sleep, Kei."

"Good night, Hana," Kei called after her.

"'Night, Kei. Love you," she responded, the "love you" an automatic response programmed into her from childhood. Kei knew because he had made sure that he said it to her every night ever since Sho had disappeared from their lives. He didn't want her growing up wondering why fate was so cruel in taking love away from her, as Kei often wondered. He wanted her to live a happy, albeit short, life. He wanted her to be loved and to love, even if the price was a short life. Kei had been "blessed" in a way with an eternal life, but it was cursed because of the short lifespan love had. The seed of love had been planted in him so many times, but its blooming time dwindled away as fast as a flower does when spring and summer are over and winter arrives to lay its cold hand upon the world. That cold hand for him had been death. But then again, Kei thought, it is for everyone, in the end.

- - - - - - -

_ Sayonara..._

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Kei smiled as he watched Hana sleep. She's such an innocent, Kei thought, his eyes filling up with tears that had never been shed. But soon, she would find out the harsh reality of the world. He didn't want her to see the corruption of the world, much less his deformed life. She was too pure. She was so pure, she was like a distant dream of this world's people, just like the painting she was painting and her mother had painted years ago.

"Kei," Hana mumbled in her sleep. "Dad."

"Bye, Hana," Kei's voice echoed within her mind. "I'll be back soon," he promised as he closed the door to the apartment they shared together.

"Time to hunt," he murmured to himself as he scattered his darkness as a warning to the foggy night air.

Time to hunt for substance of the present and of the flesh. Time to hunt dreams, time to catch lost hopes. Time.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

AN: Argh, having kinda a hard time with QuickEdit....I hope that the original format of the chapters didn't change much....


	4. Ending Theme: Love's Sayonara

"See you, Kei," Hana said, waving to Kei with her arms full with a bouquet that he had given her as a present for the revealing of her painting. She stepped into the taxi, still waving at Kei until she was unable to see him waving back at her anymore. It was a ritual that dated back to her childhood when she had lost both of her parents. Kei always insisted that waving to each other until it was impossible to see the other created an illusion of eternity, and therefore, if the two sides of the action loved each other, created an eternity of love despite the hard acceptance of a good-bye.

She hummed a pleasant bittersweet tune that she had heard ever since she was young. She always wondered if there were words to it; it seemed incomplete without words to complete the emotion that had lead to this thought of a song.

"That's a nice tune, Ms. Customer," the taxi driver remarked from the seat next to hers. "A bit sad, though. Does it have words?"

"I'm not sure; that's what I've been wondering my whole life," Hana said. The driver acknowledged her answer with a slight nod typical of polite Japanese behavior and resumed concentrating on his driving.

She did not take up the melody again, but thought about it as the taxi drove closer to the apartment she and Kei had shared for many years. She wondered what chords would fit it, how it was intended to be played. And as she crossed the distance between the symbolic home her mother had made for the world and her apartment, she mused about her life as of far and her parents: Sho, Yi-Che, and Kei.

She knew that Yi-Che had died of some disease and Sho and her uncle had died because of their involvement in the criminal underworld of Mallepa. Kei had come after her relatives' deaths. She wasn't sure how he was connected to her father, mother, and uncle, but he refused to talk about them, though he acknowledged that he knew the three of them in some way. But what gave a part of his relationship with them away was the painful and guilty look that passed across his face every time she asked about them. Hana was sure that Kei was not involved with gangs and such like her father and uncle had been, but in something else; something shady that had less to do with what he did than with his state of being.

He lived like a nocturnal creature. It was not that he slept during the daytime (indeed, he made sure to always be awake and waiting with a treat or present for her when she returned from school) but that he always disappeared at night. She would not have found this out if not for a certain nightmare that plagued her when she turned thirteen. She woke up in the early morning after her birthday, sobbing for Kei, and when he did not appear, she went to his bedroom only to find that he was not there. She sat on his bed, waiting for him to come home. She had fell asleep, and when she woke up, she was in her own bed with the bright sunlight that was filtered by the shutters in the window warming her body slightly. She had thought that it was a dream, but because she had a nightmare the week after, Kei was not there when she woke up. It became her nightly duty to fall asleep on Kei's bed, to warm it with her heat so that she could pretend that Kei was always there for her, would never disappear, even though her warmth was never returned to her except for a slight touch in the early morning when Kei returned her to her bed.

One night, she did not fall asleep because of a terrible headache. That night, she decided to lie down on the couch in front of the entrance of the apartment. That night, she saw Kei walk in with blood on his sleeve and more on his mouth. She remembered how he looked, how he reacted: his mouth slightly open, in the wolfish expression he thought was a smile, his eyes wide, his nostrils flared a bit. And over his mouth, blood. Bright red blood. Fresh blood.

She had fainted and woken up again in her bed like she had every morning. But she knew what was different. Her knowledge of Kei had changed. And from then on, she never slept in his bed. Besides, the month after she saw Kei with blood on his sleeve, she received her period and it would've been altogether too sexual to sleep in Kei's bed, even if it was a lonely bed.

Hana broke off her train of thought in synchronization with the screech of the brakes. "We're here, miss," the taxi driver said.

"Thank you," she replied, handing some bills to him. "Have a nice night."

"You too, miss, you too."

It was funny; she had never said that to Kei before. It was always "good-night" or "sleep tight" even though she knew what he really was. It was in that way that she tried to hide the fact that Kei would be hated by society if society knew what he was. It was her knowledge of him that had led her to renew her mother's painting. She wanted an angel that would love everyone, even a being such as Kei. She imagined the angel's arms wrapped fiercely around Kei, protecting him from whatever would come in the future. And then she placed herself in the place of the angel, and squeezed everything from herself and Kei so that their lives would mingle and protect the other from the future and eternity. A love for eternity.

That night, she slept on Kei's bed. She felt old enough for him now. She thought of herself as an adult now. She wanted to be the adult, to protect Kei, to shield him from whatever he feared. She prepared herself in the empty space before she truly fell asleep for that role, to tell him how she felt now that she was old enough.

But he never came back.

A week came and passed, Hana sleeping it away in Kei's bed, waking with every small sound, hoping for Kei. And that hope came and passed with the sunlight that Kei relished in her paintings but would never face in real life.

Another week came. At last she decided that it was time to look for Kei. She had prepared herself to protect Kei, but then she had left him alone in the world.

She searched and searched. She never called the police, fearing they would take him to a place where he would be exposed to his deepest and darkest fears.

She finally found a cliff with an empty red convertible sitting on top of it. It was early morning before the sun rose. She was weary of searching but could not stop unless she knew where Kei was. Knowledge of him had hurt her before, but she had to have more. She wanted more and more. She wanted the knowledge that would stretch until eternity.

In that car, she found perfect silence and tranquility. Even though it had been abandoned for more than a week, nothing and no one had disturbed it. It was a shrine to those who had came and gone.

She found Kei's clothes in the passenger seat. She did not dare touch them. But the clothes in the driver's seat she picked up. And with her motion that disturbed the clothing, she disturbed a smell from within the messy folds within the clothes. It was familiar and bittersweet. She drew them close to her nose, trying to identify what the tears in her eyes were mourning for. She closed her eyes, trying to remember, then opened them. And in front of her was a black and white picture with Kei, Sho, Yi-Che, her uncle Son, and a man unknown to her. On their faces was a clear picture of pure happiness and love. In that moment when she beheld their emotion, the sun rose. And as the picture went from black and white to color, she realized whom the driver of the car was, and what had happened to the both of them. So she lifted Sho's clothes to her face and sobbed. At last she recognized that Kei had found everything that he needed and mourned for herself for Kei had left her with a man so distant in the past that she now wished she knew. So she cried.

When her emotion was cried out, she gently laid the tear-sodden clothes on top of Kei's and drove the car back to her apartment. When she arrived, she carefully took the clothes and laid them out on Kei's bed. Looking down at them, she felt unbearably lonely. But then a melody flowed into her head describing her pain and made her feel like she was surrounded by ghosts of the pasts that would follow her into the future and eternity. As she tentatively began humming the tune, she realized the first word that belonged to it: _Sayonara._

Author's Note: I know that it's been an year… but here is the end to the fanfic that I consider my best of last summer. Here's to a new summer of writing on my part and one hopefully filled with reading on yours! Thank you for all the reviews.

P.S. Even though this is my best fanfic as of far, I plan another one that may be a parody of this fanfic. Perhaps an edited, longer version? We'll see. _Sayonara_ for now.


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